Wednesday, February 3, 2016

Fear and Loathing on the Banana Pancake Trail‏

As epic an adventure as we'd had over the previous few months, they'd been relatively hard going with not much lazing about: our bus and train trips had been long, there had been many days of walking with our backpacks due to a lack of transport, and the languages had not been easy to negotiate. So we looked forward to our upcoming South-East Asian leg for a bit of a holiday within our holiday. We looked forward to shorter travel distances, more travellers to hang out and party with, and the ease of movement and language that comes from being in a popular tourist destination. Sure enough, we found all these conveniences in buckets but, alas, there was a high price to pay. A price we found to be just too high for the sake of easy travel.

Our arrival in Thailand was a rude culture shock. The tourist industry is such a massive part of the economy and numbers of western tourists are so many relative to the local population, that the impact has been very negative. This typical backpacker route through South-East Asia is aptly called the 'Banana Pancake Trail', so named for the popular pancakes that can be found everywhere in the towns and villages en route. Pancakes are not part of the traditional local cuisine but traders have worked out that they are much loved by tourists so they have become ubiquitous, giving birth to a sarcastic name for this well trodden tourist route.

The first problem you encounter on arriving in Bangkok is that it is the mission of every Thai person working in the tourist industry to make it very, very hard for you to get off the pancake trail. Local bus stations and boat piers in both Thailand and Laos seem to have been intentionally located kilometers from the centre of town, even in one-street towns with plenty of open space. This forces you to take an exorbitantly priced tuk-tuk (three-wheeler taxi) to and from the bus stops or boat piers or, alternatively, to buy your onward tickets from your hotel or a travel agent. While the hotel-bought ticket is convenient and cheaper than going directly to the bus stations, you are inevitably put on bus/boat transport that has not a single local person and only other tourists, making us feel like part of a package tour for the first time in our lives! These buses then drop you off straight at your next hotel or in the "tourist accommodation areas" limiting your interaction with local people. Any attempt to escape this circuit ends up costing you quite a bit more in time, hassle and money.

In addition to feeling like sheep being herded from place to place, Thai and Lao people have lost a lot of their natural friendliness towards tourists. You are often treated like a number and a bother in many restaurants and hotels. It is quite common to get no response at all when greeting a local person in the street (even in the local language) rather than to get the friendly smile and enthusiastic responses we became used to in our previous travels.

It is not hard to see how this happened. Tourism has exploded in this region over the past few decades. During the high season, in the popular destinations, western tourists outnumber locals. As tourism grew and everyone wanted to get in on it, there was much promotion of the sex industry (Thailand) and drugs and alcohol (Laos). Add in poor management and regulation from the local authorities and you have an explosive, toxic mix of drunk and drugged tourists walking around in very skimpy clothing (to the point of being offensive) and regularly losing their lives in the drunken Mekong River accidents. Local people naturally began to see many tourists as lazy, crazy, disrespectful drunks that are a bad influence in their villages and towns but who need to be tolerated for the sake of an income. One certainly wouldn't bother to smile at them or return a greeting.

The lack of information distributed about Buddhist customs is another problem fueling faux pas by tourists. In Thailand and Laos, every day before sunrise the local monks, dressed in their orange robes go on a winding procession through the towns and accept gifts of sticky rice, money and sweets from the local devotees. It is customary to kneel while you offer the gift to the monks and it is not permitted to rise above a monk or to step in his shadow. Most tourists of course know none of this and local traders, seeing another opportunity to make an income, set up stalls selling offerings for the monks to tourists and put out chairs for the tourists encouraging them to sit along the route. If one is not Buddhist, it is not recommended to participate in the offering ceremonies but to rather watch unobtrusively and just observe the proceedings. We learnt these rules from a small sign in a temple that we had happened to visit but most tourists, encouraged by the locals themselves, break every rule in the book: standing up and towering over the monks to hand over offerings, taking selfie pictures and turning a solemn religious proceeding into a spectacle. We can't imagine this endears them to the general population. Better management and dispersement of information by local tourist authorities would go a long way to helping tourists to respect local customs and allow the local communities to continue their ancient traditions as authentically as possible. Unfortunately the general laissez faire attitude of the governments in these countries is not conducive to proactive intervention and both the tourist experience and local culture suffers as a result.

On a more personal note, this experience has been a lesson to us that we far prefer travel in places where there are few tourists relative to the local population and where you are more of a insignificant witness to daily life rather than the main focus of it.

These revelations aside, we decided that since we were here, all we could really do was to go with the flow and enjoy it all as much as possible. So we decided to join in and check out the infamous all-night party street of Khao San Road in Bangkok...the most striking feature of which are the ladyboys you meet. Ladyboys (or "Kathoeys") are transsexuals or transvestites who are normal part of Thai life. While you certainly meet kathoeys at parties, you will also see them during the day busy with their "normal", boring service jobs as part of society where they are not 'othered' but instead accepted and normalised. We found this wonderful and very interesting. We asked a Thai friend, who we know from back home, and who happened to be visiting Bangkok from her home in Singapore, how Thailand has come to be so progressive with regard to kathoeys. Her response was very interesting: she explained that in Thai culture, men with feminine attributes are seen as more attractive than typically male or macho ones. So a kathoey, who may even be heterosexual, is seen as just at the extreme end of feminine men. The only ugly part in this scene are some western tourists who openly leer at kathoeys and act aggressively towards them at parties and in the streets.

After a wild time in Khao San Rd we left crowded, congested Bangkok,and caught the fanciest local bus we've ever seen (complete with a backrest with an electric back massaging mechanism) and ended up in a quiet part of Koh Phangan Island which is in the south of Thailand. Koh Phangan has become renowned for its crazy full moon beach parties but, thankfully still has some unspoilt areas that have yet to receive electricity and mass tourism. We spent a week lazing on the sandy beaches and hammock flopping in our lovely wooden bungalow in a remote part of the island called Than Sadet. Of course we had to experience the full moon party phenomenon and danced all night to what has become a rather conventional - though still wild - party with multiple dance areas lining the beach, playing pop music and interspersed with little stalls selling buckets of alcohol cocktails and snacks. Unfortunately, when we returned to our guest house, a thief had gotten into our room and stolen a wack of cash - but thoughtfully left all our other valuables untouched. Obviously the full moon party is a good time to burgle rooms as it is safe to assume that tourists are at the party and have left their valuables behind...

Than Sadet, Koh Phangan, Thailand
Sunrise after full moon party, Koh Phangan, Thailand

Our bungalow, Than Sadet, Koh Phangan, Thailand


After Kho Phangan we high tailed it to Nong Kong which is is in the very north of Thailand, on the Laos border. There the activities are rather more sedate with daily meditation sessions on offer and lovely sunsets over the Mekong river. We visited the enigmatic Sala Keoku sculpture park where a Buddhist devotee and his followers have constructed a remarkable collection of strangely beautiful statues

Sala Keoku sculpture park, Nong Kong, Thailand

Sala Keoku sculpture park, Nong Kong, Thailand

Sala Keoku sculpture park, Nong Kong, Thailand

Sala Keoku sculpture park, Nong Kong, Thailand

Sala Keoku sculpture park, Nong Kong, Thailand
Although we were just across the river from Vientiane, the capital of Laos, we decided not to cross the border there but instead to head first to northwest Thailand. Our first stop took us through the touristy town of Chiang Mai, which didn't hold much charm for us and, after just one night, we headed straight to Pai. Pai still has a rural, hippie village feel with the accommodation built around rice paddies and with the some lovely natural hot springs and waterfalls nearby. One has to use a scooter to seek out the best local spots away from the more touristy ones but that was relatively easy to do. In the evenings, when we had the munchies, we headed straight to the night market known as "Walking Street" which offers an incredible range of delicious meals at super cheap prices. Pai also has lots of great live music performed by an eclectic mix of travellers who end up living for months in this pretty, laid-back town. Having thoroughly enjoyed these lazy indulgent days in Pai, it was time to head to Laos.

Pai, Thailand

Stoned in the hot springs, Pai, Thailand


We headed for the border at Houay Xai where the crossing was thankfully easy and hassle-free. After an overnight in the border town, we boarded the two-day "slow boat" that would take us to Luang Prabang meandering along the Mekong River with an overnight stop in the village of Pak Beng. This trip, though touristy, was pleasant with beautiful views of river side villages and Laos' still verdant tropical forests.

View from the Slow Boat to Luang Prabang

View from the Slow Boat to Luang Prabang


View from the Slow Boat to Luang Prabang

View from the Slow Boat to Luang Prabang

View from the Slow Boat to Luang Prabang

Luang Prabang is a Unesco World heritage town with dozens of beautiful temples and old colonial French buildings that have been well restored. While this makes for pretty accommodation and restaurant options, the heritage part of the town was out of our budget. The rest of the town is nothing special and with the focal point now a 2km long covered tourist-only night market, it is fast losing any Laotian authenticity. Worse still, local religious traditions have become marred by locals wanting to monetise whatever they can and tourists who have not been informed by local authorities of appropriate behaviour, ignorantly stepping all over the sacred traditions. Besides the truly breathtaking waterfall in the middle of the forest where we chilled and swam for half a day, we found Luang Prabang disappointing and we decided to head off instead to the more remote villages in northern Laos.

Sunset over Luang Prabang, Laos

Sunset over Luang Prabang, Laos

Source of Kuang Si waterfall, Luang Prabang, Laos

Kuang Si waterfall, Luang Prabang, Laos
Our first stop in the north of the country was in Nong Kiaw, a small riverside village which has escaped most of the tourists throngs. The weather had now turned a little rainy and our grass and bamboo hut by the riverside, although charming, was a little chilly. There were some nice hikes in the area and we could see that the local people were becoming increasingly friendly and more laid back, as is often the case as one moves away from the transaction-only nature of relations that beset very touristy areas. This seemed promising and we knew we had to get more remote. The only way to do this was by boat upriver to the inaccessible village of Muang Ngoi.

Muang Ngoi, Laos

Muang Ngoi, Laos

village near Muang Ngoi, Laos

roasting chicken feet, Muang Ngoi, Laos

New year celebrations near Muang Ngoi, Laos

Walks through the surrounding villages of Muang Ngoi, during the New Year celebrations of the Akha peoples meant invitations to sample home-brewed 'Lao Lao' whisky and local food. This more authentic atmosphere was definitely more to our liking and we decided to hike the 20km to Ban Phon, a tiny village that has no river access. Here the New Year celebrations were also in full swing and we enjoyed an afternoon of local singing that sounded a little like Mongolian overtone throat singing. On arrival we were immediately invited into a homestay by a mother and her two lovely and surprisingly confident little girls who were about seven years old. They followed us around most of the time and at one point challenged us to a local game played with some kind of beans or seeds and that Dave mastered far too quickly for their liking :) We sat around the fire at dawn the next morning roasting veggies and watching village life go by while Rejane had her hair twisted into an attractive new style! The family were very welcoming and fed us well. The single blanket on the floor that served as our bed, in a room bare of any solid furniture and no toilets around, was the most basic we'd experience on our Asian travels so far.

Akha new year celebrations, Ban Phon, Laos

Akha new year celebrations, Ban Phon, Laos

village life, Ban Phon, Laos

village life, Ban Phon, Laos

Our host's kid making a morning fire, Ban Phon, Laos

village life, Ban Phon, Laos

village life, Ban Phon, Laos

village life, Ban Phon, Laos

We walked the 20km back down the road and the next day caught a boat followed by a local bus which took us even further north to the densely forested area of Luang Namtha. Here we splashed out for a guided tour through thick bamboo forests and were treated to a picnic forest lunch eaten off wild banana leaf plates with chopsticks fashioned out of bamboo on the spot - delicious!

Bamboo forest lunch on banana leaves, Luang Namtha, Laos
We were travelling with a new Chinese travel-buddy which was great timing as our last spot on our northern route was close to the border with China and Myanmar where some Chinese is spoken. This trip took us into the infamous 'Golden Triangle' located in the centre of the old opium trade route. While this trade is supposed to have been all but stamped out, arrival in the city immediately brings out a handful of little wizened old ladies who press the brown putty-like stuff on you pretty much every time you step foot into the street or even out the door of your room. Ventures around the area took us into the villages of the Akha people, who were also celebrating their New Year and so more exhortations to sample the 'Lao Lao' and join in a meal. There appeared to be a fondness for steak tartar-like dishes of uncooked spiced minced meat and bowls of roughly chopped chunks of raw red meat and bone swimming in blood - we managed to stick to the rice and veggie dishes washed down with the ubiquitos BeerLao! The celebrations continued into the evening where the graceful, slow-moving dance steps involving daintily walking around in a big circle with men and women side by side, delicately twirling their hands became too much for us to bear and we couldn't resist adding a bit of African butt-shaking flair much to the amusement of the crowd. The children didn't bother to hold back and guffawed at these strange foreigners who were already a spectacle for just being present.
Old ladies looking at pictures of Bulungula

Akha new year celebrations, near Muang Sing, Laos
 Having satisfied our craving for some authentic Laotian experiences, it was time to get back on our way towards the south and, unavoidably back onto the Banana Pancake Trail. Anyway New Year's eve was coming up so a bit of a party was in order. Vang Vieng is a beautiful village on a clear river surrounded by the dramatic Karst landscapes of East-Asia that we've come to love. Tubing down the river with leisurely stops at the numerous bars and restaurants along the banks made for a very pleasant afternoon. In years past Vang Vieng was a notoriously deadly tourism disaster zone with a tourist dying every two weeks on this tubing trip as the riverbank bars competed to attract customers with increasingly dangerous river swings and slides combined with alcohol and drug freebies that inevitably ended in regular drownings. Amazingly it took years for the government to intervene but when it did, it managed to shut down most of the most dangerously wild activities while not killing the vibe entirely. Tubing is still fun, and shots of Laolao are still dispensed, but the atmosphere feels relatively under control. Strangely, Vang Vieng restaurants find it necessary to have dozens of giant flat screen TVs playing endless reruns of the Friends sitcom which some tourists seem unable to get enough of... a bizarre way to spend one's holiday...

Tubing down the river, Vang Vieng, Laos

Tubing down the river, Vang Vieng, Laos

Vang Vieng, Laos

Cave at Vang Vieng, Laos

Cave, Vang Vieng, Laos

Riverside dining at tables built on stilts in the river and a cracking good New Years eve party made a few days at Vang Vieng a great holiday spot. However with time running out on our 30 day visa, we couldn't afford more than a day's recovery from the New Years Eve party before the obligatory stop in the country's capital: Vientiane.

Vientiane is a low-key, capital city on the banks of the Mekong of which Graham Greene is alleged to have said: "what is the point of travelling 8000 miles only to find Vientiane at the end of the road". We found that description a bit harsh but nevertheless spent just one night there enjoying a riverside dinner watching the sun set over the Mekong. The next day we visited the excellent COPE museum which provides information about the impact of unexploded cluster bombs on Laos. Few people know that during the time of the Vietnam War there was a parallel "Secret War" in Laos during which the USA dropped roughly the same number of bombs on Laos as were dropped during the entire Second World War in Europe! Many of these bombs were cluster bombs which each release hundreds of tiny "bombies" of which typically 30% fail to detonate. These bombies are scattered across the country in forests and farmland and kill or maim 300 people in Laos every year.

"Stop cluster bombs" sculpture, Vientiane, Laos


In addition to some powerful videos campaigning against the continued use of cluster bombs today, there were very informative exhibits on the work being done by the MAG organisation to rid Laos of the millions of remaining undetonated bombs as well as on COPE's efforts to help people who have been physically disabled by these barbaric weapons.

From Vientiane it was an uncomfortable overnight bus on Laos' terrible roads to our final destination: a chill-out spot on the 4000 islands. These islands are situated in the middle of the Mekong river and we chose to base ourselves on the 'happy' island of Don Det where Mary Jane enhancements to your pizzas, brownies, fruit shakes and even fried rice are printed on the food menus! The accommodation was simple, stilted bungalows overlooking the relatively clear, green river and there were a plethora of restaurants where all the usual backpacker goodies were offered by mostly unhappy-looking local folk.

Don Det (4000 Islands), Laos

Don Det (4000 Islands), Laos

Luckily five days of complete relaxation in Don Det fortified us for dealing with the frustrating shenanigans around the border crossings in the region. The first challenge was getting to the border without taking the 'package tourist' transport and not having that 'sheep-like' feeling of being herded from pillar to post. The first step, taking a boat off the island was easy enough but getting a tuk-tuk or taxi to drive you the 20kms to the border was much harder. Most tuk-tuk drivers refused but after much looking around and some back and forth negotiation of prices, we found someone desperate enough for the money. Why there had to be such a song and dance for a 20km ride soon became clear when the driver stopped 3kms short of the border post and wanted us to walk the rest of the way. Through his handcuff hand motions we understood that the police would hassle him for taking tourists on an independent ride to the border, instead of us using the 'tourist transport' run as a monopoly by a local company. When the police arrived, we made a big show of giving our tuk-tuk driver our last few notes, that were not worth much (even though we'd already paid him in full earlier) in order to help him fool the policeman into believing that we hadn't paid much for the journey and so that he could escape being forced to pay a hefty bribe.

That was just the first step. Next we had to exit Laos. In order to be given the exit stamp, a 'stamp fee' of USD $2 was demanded. We heard about this scam in which no receipts were available and so a standoff began: us lying down on the floor with our heads on our backpacks looking very comfortable while reading our books... After an hour or so, the increasingly alarmed officials realised that we were not going to pay and we were stamped out and quickly waved on our way before the tourist buses full of sheep ready to be fleeced arrived.

The Cambodian border was no better and after a bit of haggling, we explained to the surprised Cambodian official that we had not paid the Laos exit stamp and we definitely weren't going to pay for anything other than the $30 required for the Cambodian visa. He gave in and stamped us in and waited for the imminent arrival of easier tourist prey. A little perseverance and doggedness against participating in the corruption that besets many developing countries, chalked up a small victory for the good guys, along with a saving of about R600.

And as we entered Cambodia the mood changed immediately with smiles and positive vibes a refreshing change from our past 2 months in Thailand and Laos...

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